Keeping it Clean
7:19 AM
For the past few weeks, instead of exhausting most of my
attention to my studies, I spend most of my time cleaning the house and trying
to maintain its cleanliness.
Since I have school now (which requires me to study a lot even when
at home) I’ve been quite obsess in trying to maintain a clean working environment.
Which is good right? I don’t know bout others, but I seem to enjoy making the
house feel like a home. I like to be that type of woman who knows her way
around the house, I don’t want to get married someday then only start learning
how to cook, clean etc.
Seems like a good quality right? Yeah it was all good until I
recently became so impatient with a messy place. And when I say impatient, I mean
angry 18 year old. It came to the point where I would tidy up our room/house
everyday, even twice a day only to find it messed up when I come home. It’s not
that my brother or sister is downright messy, I just seem to have this standard
everyone has to meet.
A typical scenario would be me tidying up and organizing
things at home before I leave for school and coming home finding certain stuff
disorganized and there I go with my angry party like a crazy moody woman. At
first it all still felt normal, since everyone thought “Yeah who wouldn’t be
angry?” but then this scenario was repeated everyday, then I started being
rude to my family, and forgot that they’re my family. I was so lost in my intention/obsession. You know what I mean?
My intentions in keeping the house clean was all good, but
the effect it has on me and the people around me is not near anything good. I
forgot that as a Christian I must give the same amount of patience I give to
friends or even strangers , to the people I live with everyday. Sometimes we
Christians in the ministry, tend to focus on putting all our strength and
effort to those friends we have or to those strangers we meet, and when people say that we are good, we feel
as if we’re really becoming Christ like to others. But the thing is, we need to
learn how to balance these things, we need to be Christ like first at home
before we become Christ like outside. ouch, what a slap to the face.
As I begin to realize this I wonder if my siblings and my
parents would really consider me as a Christ like person, oh well with the way I’ve
been acting up recently, I think not. It’s a really big challenge for me, I need
to be able to serve without expecting something in return, in this case
cleaning the house without expecting it to look just the way I left it. I think i inherited this obsession w/ cleanliness from my Mom, I laugh to myself when I remember
the times she would scold me because I did not fix my bed, or I did not put certain
things back to their rightful place. And now, I say the same lines she used to say.
The difference now is that she seems more chill about this whole thing, she’s
more patient and more understanding than I am.
Instead of glorifying God by being a good daughter and
keeping the house clean, I began to be a rude, impatient sibling/daughter. Oh
no…tsk tsk.
I don’t know if you even understand what I am talking about,
but by just writing all these thoughts down I am able to learn a lot of
lessons. First is, it’s really a woman’s job to keep everything clean & organized.
Second, while doing that job, we women must ask for an extra fill of patience
& understanding. Third, serve your family whole heartedly, make them feel
the love of Jesus. And Fourth, whatever you do, do it for the Glory of God.
Right now, I’m trying to keep my mood on the bright side by
silently putting back the things I see that aren’t in their rightful place. J
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